This week has really gotten away from me. It seems like no matter how carefully I plan my day, something always happens and my "To Do" list sprouts little wings and flies out the window. Life happens (as we all know) and some things just have to be pushed aside.
My "To Do" list seems to get longer every day. I have a mountain of sewing to do (with deadlines!), a cleaning schedule to keep track of, meals to get on the table, three books I'm in the process of reading, a baby blanket to finish, a journal to fill, personal Bible study, a painting to work on, a little sister who wants to learn how to sew, and blog posts to write. Have I worked on all of these things? Unfortunately, no.
Why can't I seem to get everything done? Well, one day we'll have unexpected company and the next there will be last minute trips to the doctor. Maybe errands take longer than planned or my lesson plans that I worked so hard on don't go as planned. Dinner doesn't turn out and it takes forever to clean up the mess - whatever the case may be, NOTHING has been working the way I want it too!!!
After about a week of complete frustration I finally just broke down. I had been running around like crazy but I didn't seem to be accomplishing anything. My whole body was worn out and I just couldn't function anymore.
Yesterday morning I woke up in a bad mood. I was just so irritated I couldn't see straight. Here I have all of this stuff to do and it's halfway through the week and I haven't done any of it! I slung myself out of bed and stomped my way downstairs to breakfast. With out even a "Good morning" I started setting the table not really caring if the dishes rattled as I carelessly put them on the table. I won't go into details, but I will say that I was very unkind to my family during breakfast.
After everything was cleared away I went back to my room to vent my frustration. I pulled out my laptop and started browsing through the blogs that I follow. I came across an article in one of them that you can read at http://thevalueofone.com/?p=1809. I read it several times and each time I was more amazed at how it spelled out everything that I have been going through.
This article made me realize that I have been trying to handle all of these situations on my own. I never thought to ask God to help me through them. At times I have been labeled a "control freak" and in many ways that is true. I like things to go the way I have them planned out in my head and I like them to happen now, not tomorrow or next week or next month. NOW.
When things don't work the way I want them to I get headaches, I pace up and down, wave my arms in the air and in some cases my tongue moves a mile a minute (my poor mother's ears!). You can imagine how I felt after about a week of this. I was wound up so tight I was about to bust!
But, yesterday morning as I lay on my bed reading I realized how helpless I really am. I can do nothing without God. If I really were in control...heaven help us! I wouldn't last two seconds! But, for some reason I think that I am in control and I tend to go through life as if I really am. Thankfully, God is showing me that no matter how much I plan and schedule, He has the final say. Unfortunately, we often differ in opinion.
So from now on, when something happens to mess up my plans I just need to remember to say a prayer asking for patience and thanking God that He is in control. And then there's the hard part - picking myself up and carrying on with a cheerful attitude.
My "To Do" list seems to get longer every day. I have a mountain of sewing to do (with deadlines!), a cleaning schedule to keep track of, meals to get on the table, three books I'm in the process of reading, a baby blanket to finish, a journal to fill, personal Bible study, a painting to work on, a little sister who wants to learn how to sew, and blog posts to write. Have I worked on all of these things? Unfortunately, no.
Why can't I seem to get everything done? Well, one day we'll have unexpected company and the next there will be last minute trips to the doctor. Maybe errands take longer than planned or my lesson plans that I worked so hard on don't go as planned. Dinner doesn't turn out and it takes forever to clean up the mess - whatever the case may be, NOTHING has been working the way I want it too!!!
After about a week of complete frustration I finally just broke down. I had been running around like crazy but I didn't seem to be accomplishing anything. My whole body was worn out and I just couldn't function anymore.
Yesterday morning I woke up in a bad mood. I was just so irritated I couldn't see straight. Here I have all of this stuff to do and it's halfway through the week and I haven't done any of it! I slung myself out of bed and stomped my way downstairs to breakfast. With out even a "Good morning" I started setting the table not really caring if the dishes rattled as I carelessly put them on the table. I won't go into details, but I will say that I was very unkind to my family during breakfast.
After everything was cleared away I went back to my room to vent my frustration. I pulled out my laptop and started browsing through the blogs that I follow. I came across an article in one of them that you can read at http://thevalueofone.com/?p=1809. I read it several times and each time I was more amazed at how it spelled out everything that I have been going through.
This article made me realize that I have been trying to handle all of these situations on my own. I never thought to ask God to help me through them. At times I have been labeled a "control freak" and in many ways that is true. I like things to go the way I have them planned out in my head and I like them to happen now, not tomorrow or next week or next month. NOW.
When things don't work the way I want them to I get headaches, I pace up and down, wave my arms in the air and in some cases my tongue moves a mile a minute (my poor mother's ears!). You can imagine how I felt after about a week of this. I was wound up so tight I was about to bust!
But, yesterday morning as I lay on my bed reading I realized how helpless I really am. I can do nothing without God. If I really were in control...heaven help us! I wouldn't last two seconds! But, for some reason I think that I am in control and I tend to go through life as if I really am. Thankfully, God is showing me that no matter how much I plan and schedule, He has the final say. Unfortunately, we often differ in opinion.
So from now on, when something happens to mess up my plans I just need to remember to say a prayer asking for patience and thanking God that He is in control. And then there's the hard part - picking myself up and carrying on with a cheerful attitude.
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